Labels: why you do not fit your own identity

I wrote a post awhile aback about labels and how hesitant I was to give myself one of a feminist.

I was also hesitant to give myself the 'in a relationship' and 'girlfriend' label this past month. But I discovered something. With a label, you may have negative consequences but you also may have positive consequences as well.

For example, the moment I admitted that my manfriend was actually my manfriend. It was like something lifted and I could breathe again. And even though I was happy being single, I am still happy in a relationship.

And some labels are hard to get.

I'll explain myself. Some American Indians can not identify or label themselves as American Indians because they do not have enough 'blood' to be considered one by their tribe.

I learned something even worse last night. In a few tribes, if a American Indian woman marries out of that tribe, she is no longer able to receive the benefits of being part of that tribe. (Whether that be land or money or having a say in tribal meetings). In another tribes on the other side of the country, her children would be also be punished. However, if a man marries a women from outside of that tribe, nothing changes.

And the sad thing is, the supreme court approved this for these tribes.

Patriarchy at it's finest. It's like women are less of their ethnicity because of their sex and their gender. And can I tell you something, that makes me completely furious.

Of course, it's none of my business to tell the tribes what they can and can not do. White people have done that for centuries and it's time for the U.S. to let these nations decide their own futures. I believe that is why the Supreme Court approved these policies.

When I looked it up, most of these tribes were matriarchal.  Not in the fact that women lead everything, they didn't. But in the fact that their society was egalitarian. Egalitarian means equal power, or shared power.

But also, the society respected women for their opinions, for their input. When marriages occurred the man would move to the woman's family home and the children would be hers. She would not lose her tribal relations and neither would he, if it was possible.

It's sadly no longer that way for many tribes. Because the entrance of European missionaries and settlers, many tribes adopted European religions and lifestyles, but also the patriarchal society. They lost the ancient tribal languages, their government and so much more.

So, I will be thankful of the labels and identities I can choose to give myself, for some can not give themselves their preferred labels and identities.

What's so wrong with equality?

So I was hoping that the first thing that would pop up when I typed in feminism in google is, you know, a site that actually promoted feminism. But it wasn't; it was this.

Now, first of all, this is horrible, horrible propaganda and this is also terrible for the true Christian cause.

I do not think that women are filing for divorce twice the rate as men because of feminism. I believe that women are filing for divorce because their marriage is not working. Yes, the fact that they can file for divorce is feminism-doing. Thank goodness we have that right.

The fact that they try to prove these anti-feminist agendas with slashed biblical quotes out of context is ridiculous. What a horrible way to use the bible. The bible should be used to unify people, make people love each other, but that might be a little too ideal Utopia thinking on my part.

I don't think Eve sinned because she is a woman. I think she sinned because humans are sinners. Using part of a story to try and say that all women are going to follow her steps is ignorant. Look at all of the evil other men have done while in power. Wars, genocide, massacres, brutalization, torture, rape...can we say that all men are evil just because the past illustrates it? No. We can just hope that anyone will not repeat the same mistakes.

"biblically a woman's place is still in the home?" HELLO, THE BIBLE WAS WRITTEN YEARS AND YEARS AGO. Of course, it saying the same thing. The bible does not change with time. It will always be the same. The world will not.

You'll see many lies in this site. Don't believe everything you read on the internet. Let's be real folks and be critical in what you see. What is so wrong with women wanting to be equal to men? Maybe if equality actually existed the world would not be at the state it is today. (Which is what this website was trying to say: that feminism caused all the world evils...)

If you really want to learn about feminism, lets try a real feminist site. Wikipedia might even work better.

(And just to let you know, that picture of the 'aborted baby' is actually a picture of a premature birth...it says so on the picture. And Whoopi Goldberg is not homosexual...she has not disproved if she is bisexual or not however.)

God's out there to save a few certain people

Religion and I have a love/hate relationship.

I remember telling my friends in high school that I was so indifferent to religion that I would go to whatever faith whoever I was dating at the times was. One of my friends started laughing and said: "I can totally see you going to synagogue on Saturday, and then christians faith on Saturday, going to India, praising Buddha..."

And it was true. College certainly hasn't changed me. I still am indifferent about the religious aspect.

It seems like every religion is at fault for something horrible at one point of time. Catholics have the monks and priests that can not hold to their celibacy pledge. Prostestants were kicked out of England but then discriminated against every other belief that was inside of the U.S. and outside the U.S.. Christianity in general has ties to erasing culture all over the world. (Because God saves). And some intrepretations of the Muslim beliefs think that female circumcision is okay....I can go on.

Organized religion can be horrible. And it can lead to many other good things.

Finding 'God' or a religion can save you. It won't save everyone. But it can save some others. Faith is important in some people's lives and in others it isn't.

This is my belief. You believe what you want. Then let others believe what they want, too.

We only reach trouble with religion when one person tries telling another person what to do. Yes, have places of worship. (Or for atheist, non-worship places.) You can even worship here...

[From the Steinfeldt Photography Collection of the Jewish Historical Society of the Upper Midwest. Records]

Don't form hate groups to hate on other religions, or even to tell people what is the right religion. Just don't. Just mind your own business.

What's it hurting you if someone doesn't believe in your God? Your feelings?

Notice I say "believe". I know that there are some individuals out there who do more than just believe in 'God'. They discriminate, hate and push their beliefs on individuals who do not believe in their god. That's wrong.

God will save you. But that is your choice.

Cultural Eraser

Americans have been infamous for erasing other cultures.

Most of you know a brief history of the U.S., all of you should know that there were people here before the Europeans. All of you should know that we pushed them out of their land and destroyed cultures and families. Some people refer to this as the United States Holocaust.

Which, you know, it was.

I have said before that I believe it is possible to live together with diversity and with out conflict.

I know it was possible for them, too.

Right now I am taking an American Indian Literature class. And the professor always reminds us that our ancestors were not violent. This is reassuring.

It wasn't just with American Indians. And this isn't in the past.

Let's talk about American Indian Boarding schools. Those existed in the U.S. until the 1960s. Many of you probably do not know what those are. American Indian Boarding schools were a way to take the 'savage out of the Indian.' The U.S. government snatched children from their homes at young ages (earliest I heard of was 3 years old) and took them to boarding schools far away from their families.

These boarding schools were designed by a military individual. The students were uniformed and not allowed to speak their native language or practice those traditions. Because this went on for a century, many American Indian cultures traditions were erased. Even their languages has disappeared.

Is 1960s not soon enough for you?

Let's talk about the Somalis.

We have a chance to make our past mistakes that: past mistakes.

But people are too ignorant to notice that we are making the same mistakes all over again.

Most Somalis are Muslims and their religion requires them to pray 5 times a day, everyday. This seems to be a huge problem for everyone. This does not effect Christian Americans in any way, and it is only a disturbance when individuals try to stop Muslims from following their religious traditions.

Today, many Americans are trying to stop the ceremonies of other cultures. TODAY. This is not in the past. By stopping the ceremonies, the traditions of these cultures, these cultures will disappear.

I do not know why people are so affected by Muslims praying every day and five times a day thing. It doesn't effect me.

Locally, this is what is happening in my area. Muslims, some Americans, some Immigrants and some visiting, are getting prohibited from practicing their religion. I see no wrong in allowing individuals of the Muslim faith to pray.

Maybe I'm not seeing something. Is it really that wrong to allow 15 minutes maybe three times a school or work day for people to pray. If you think that it is unfair for the non-Christian workers, make it a break for everyone.

There is this argument that Christians don't recieve breaks for praying or religious activities.

Why are so many stores with limited hours on Sundays? Why do we have Christmas off? Why in the world is everything closed on Easter? Ahh, yes. Because of the Christians. Just because Christians are not receiving daily 'breaks' or accommodations does not mean Christians do not recieve anything.

Sadly Americans are not stopping at the United States. Many are going overseas as missionaries to try to 'change the world' as the 'hands of God'. I have no problem with education. I have no problem with Churches raising money to help 3rd World Countries. I do have a problem when people trying to convert anyone who isn't their religion. These people have cultures, religions and traditions. These people do not need our God. What they need is education about surviving, maybe english, maybe some training for jobs.

One of the United States biggest faults is what they did to American Indian cultures, and Irish American cultures, and Italian American cultures, Mexican American cultures, Chinese American Culture, and African American cultures.

Yes, it is just not one ethnicity we did this too, it was every ethnicity that 'Americans' came across.

We erased their culture. We erased everyone's culture. Making America seem cultureless and boring.

Uh Oh.

I posted a comment on a pro-life movement video on youtube months ago and this is the reply I got (months ago):

Truth is that there are no unwanted pregnacies or babies if people are responsible with sex. You may think me prude or unrealistic to support the idea of waiting until you find the person you want to spend your life with but let me ask you this...

Who do you want to be or be with? Someone who respects a woman enough to wait for sex or someone who uses a woman for sex and leaves her with a pregnancy that neither wants?

My Response:

Let's just say you use birth control everyday correctly. That's responsible right? I would describe that as responsible. But birth control fails, condoms break. You know, life happens. And just because one thing goes wrong, doesn't mean you should not have a choice to walk away from a pregnancy.

I don't think this girl is a prude. Not at all. Stand next to your beliefs, proudly, woman! But that is your choice to wait for 'the one'. It's not everyone's.

I want to be with someone who respects me. But there is something wrong with the logic here:

• One, you are assuming all people who get married are angels. Some aren't. It's sad. But divorce happens for a reason. Just because you are married to someone doesn't mean that individual is going to respect you. (Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston...I don't think they respected each other after awhile?!? Do you? What about O.J. Simpson, he was married and didn't respect his wife?)
• Two, not all men walk away. Yes, single non-married men have an easier chance to walk away from a pregnancy. It doesn't mean they do. (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie aren't married, and he hasn't walked away.)

I believe in healthy sex. I believe this can happen in any type of relationship. Friends with benefits, marriage, relationships, partnerships, whatever you want to be labelled as. It can happen. A person can respect you and not be married to you. A person can respect you and not spend forever with you.

I don't know. Maybe it is too late for me. Maybe I am forever doomed in to an afterlife with a firey pit of lava. I'll accept it. I've sinned. I've taken the Lords name in vain. And worst of all, I've judged people.

I've learned from my mistakes. And I move on. I don't believe my lifestyle is for everyone. I don't believe that I should force my viewpoint on other people. Everything should be your choice to make. What food you choose to eat, what clothing you choose to wear, what God(s) you believe in, if you believe in a god, whether or not you have sex with out marriage. I can't tell you that's right. I can't tell you that's wrong. Do what you believe is right, and stand up for it when challenged. Don't do what you believe is wrong. It's simple.

The last thing I want to do is get in the way of someone's happiness. Personal choices are that. Personal. I'll leave it to you to decide.

Yes or No or Maybe or Sometimes or When it is Convenient

I live in a country where people can choose what they want to believe in.

And although it is ultimate brainwashing organizations. I am proud that we have a choice of what to believe in.

I partially watched a documentary on Polygamy today. I was half watching, half trying to do my homework, half hanging out with a friend...three halves is a lot. A conversation came up. Doesn't it always?

"Is polygamy right?" was the topic of the discussion. And I said yes.

Yes, it must blow your mind that I said yes. But here is the deal. As long as the plural marriage involves all consensual individuals that are of age, I have no problem with it. And it would be great if incest or abuse didn't happen in these relationships too, then I would REALLY have no problem.

Because basically, we live in a country where people can be brainwashed beyond belief and think the god of the world is Marilyn Monroe...and as long as they are not harming people other than themselves I have no problem with that. (But that's my belief so I am biased...hah!)

And for me, what matters is if those people had a choice and if they have the same choice today.