Uh Oh.

I posted a comment on a pro-life movement video on youtube months ago and this is the reply I got (months ago):

Truth is that there are no unwanted pregnacies or babies if people are responsible with sex. You may think me prude or unrealistic to support the idea of waiting until you find the person you want to spend your life with but let me ask you this...

Who do you want to be or be with? Someone who respects a woman enough to wait for sex or someone who uses a woman for sex and leaves her with a pregnancy that neither wants?

My Response:

Let's just say you use birth control everyday correctly. That's responsible right? I would describe that as responsible. But birth control fails, condoms break. You know, life happens. And just because one thing goes wrong, doesn't mean you should not have a choice to walk away from a pregnancy.

I don't think this girl is a prude. Not at all. Stand next to your beliefs, proudly, woman! But that is your choice to wait for 'the one'. It's not everyone's.

I want to be with someone who respects me. But there is something wrong with the logic here:

• One, you are assuming all people who get married are angels. Some aren't. It's sad. But divorce happens for a reason. Just because you are married to someone doesn't mean that individual is going to respect you. (Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston...I don't think they respected each other after awhile?!? Do you? What about O.J. Simpson, he was married and didn't respect his wife?)
• Two, not all men walk away. Yes, single non-married men have an easier chance to walk away from a pregnancy. It doesn't mean they do. (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie aren't married, and he hasn't walked away.)

I believe in healthy sex. I believe this can happen in any type of relationship. Friends with benefits, marriage, relationships, partnerships, whatever you want to be labelled as. It can happen. A person can respect you and not be married to you. A person can respect you and not spend forever with you.

I don't know. Maybe it is too late for me. Maybe I am forever doomed in to an afterlife with a firey pit of lava. I'll accept it. I've sinned. I've taken the Lords name in vain. And worst of all, I've judged people.

I've learned from my mistakes. And I move on. I don't believe my lifestyle is for everyone. I don't believe that I should force my viewpoint on other people. Everything should be your choice to make. What food you choose to eat, what clothing you choose to wear, what God(s) you believe in, if you believe in a god, whether or not you have sex with out marriage. I can't tell you that's right. I can't tell you that's wrong. Do what you believe is right, and stand up for it when challenged. Don't do what you believe is wrong. It's simple.

The last thing I want to do is get in the way of someone's happiness. Personal choices are that. Personal. I'll leave it to you to decide.

Activism: What to Do

I am actually not pro-life. But there activism techniques are going to get them what they want: an end to abortion. They realized that our youth is crucial for change and this is really important for a cause.

So what should pro-choice people to to keep the choice in the women's hands? Help the youth step up and help the cause.

On another note, I am so excited to see Courtney Martin talk about activism on Tuesday!!

Planned Parenthood: Support oppresses Trans, Ignores Male Benefits, & Promotes Gender Stereotypes!

This video is pretty amusing and it makes a point. That's my first admittance.

There is a few things I find that this video ignores and actually does not help the cause.

Point #1: We are ignoring two groups that CAN use Planned Parenthood and may or may not have Vaginas.

First of all, not all women have vaginas. Hello, transexuals/transgenders? Anyone? In fact, many trans are turned away from sexual health care because of who they are. Not because they aren't sick, but because who they identify as doesn't match their 'goodies.'

Second of all, men can use planned parenthood too. STD testing and sexual health, etc. And they should use Planned Parenthood. Planned Parenthood may seem like they are focusing on women's issues, but they will not turn down a man that needs important health services.

I feel like this video makes a really good point. But I also feel like they are supporting the fact that Planned Parenthood is only for Cis, straight females. And it is not, just for them.

Planned Parenthood is an amazing, amazing, amazing creation. If this is how you show support, go for it. But is all support good support? Or by ignoring two (or more? Let's not forget they ignored L and G groups.) groups of people that can use this clinic, are we hindering the movement? We are oppressing one group and ignoring the fact that another can use this services.

But this video also tells women that they should be able to control their sexual life.This is a very good thing! Be proud of your sexuality and sleep with who you want to! At first, I was like "Heck yeah you go girls!! You choose with who you sleep with and you dump those bigots!"

Women have power in their sexuality and I think that if you need to use it for survival, you should use it. That means, that sometimes, women do not have the choice of who they sleep with. Women having the choice of who they choose to sleep with is a very privileged and somewhat Western ideology. With men having most of the political say in most countries and most of those men being straight, will women control these men by holding off sex?

Point #2: Which brings me to the next point of why I find this video harmful, it promotes gender roles and stereotypes. They are saying that all men think with their 'goodies' and women have the power to control that thinking. If the only control I have in a relationship is sexual-based, I don't think I would consider that a healthy or safe relationship. How far does sexual control go? And if men really think with their 'goodies' then what stops them from going out and buying sex from a exploited women? (Which makes the whole logic of the stereotype, men only think with their 'goodies', out the windows and not valid.)

I don't know, if this video is going to help Planned Parenthood or not. I do not know if it is even going to help "straight cis-females" and that is what the video says Planned Parenthood helps in the first place. We are conforming women to their sexuality and forgetting the fact that women have other things to offer. (Like intelligence, talent, BRAINS?!?!?)

If you support the mission of Planned Parenthood, which is to educate young adults on their sexual safety. Please sign this petition now. Remember, Planned Parenthood is not all about abortion, it is not all about women and it is not all about sexual health.

(Update: Hey, look! It's all 'white; woman in the video too! I mean, there is a woman of Asian descent and perhaps another woman of different ethnic group, but they are both very light in color...)